dog-eat-dog [notes]

Unhitched chapter notes …

Read chapter on AO3

First, I promise there is a plot, like a legitimate plot with action and a point. For some reason, ch 27 was originally 1k words strapped to the beginning of a said actiony chapter. Then I was all, “You know what I want? A mind palace or something,” and then I added 5k more words and a whole new plot arc and IT’S NOT COMPLICATED THOUGH. I swear.

If you believe anything I say, you have not been reading carefully. I am a very unreliable author. *head desk*

I don’t feel like this chapter was unnecessary, but it does seem to drag. I’m sorry about that if you feel it dragging. But maybe it’s just me because I’ve read it 800 times. I feel like I lost my ability to pace in the last few months. The last two chapters were building up to this inevitability (ch 27) and I swear there will be less redundancy in the very near future.


redundant [n.] –

  1. characterized by verbosity or unnecessary repetition in expressing ideas.
  2. exceeding what is usual or natural.
  3. having some unusual or extra part or feature.
  4. characterized by superabundance or superfluity.

Oh, who am I kidding, the first definition applies too.


That said … they fuck – missionary, then doggy, teaspoons, then lotus – for reasons … probably. I’m not a fan of symbolism.

FYI, I’m not doing the lube stuff anymore, at least not for now. It’s implied. You don’t need to read about it all the time. Did the Jinn lube up in American Gods? No. (Look at me making that ridiculous comparison. I’m laugh-crying now.) And you don’t necessarily know what Butcher did while Hop was sleeping (creepy bastard). Just assume they are still slicked up from the last sexual escapade they all went on. It’s not like animal fat dries out and disappears or something …

The “no more unnecessary descriptions of lube” declaration is a blanket statement tossed over the rest of the fic because Unhitched is rapidly turning into a philosophical novel, and how much lube does Plato really talk about?

Ok, I looked that up. A little actually … in Protagoras. But he’s talking about olive oil and he basically says “USE IT IN MODERATION.” And he’s talking about eating it, not fuckin’ with it, but who am I kidding … he was Greek. I mean … we all know what he says in Symposium … ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)

Men who are a section of that double nature which was once called androgynous [the man/woman beast that Zeus split to form the sexes] are lovers of women, adulterers are generally of this breed, and also adulterous women who lust after men. The women who are a section of the woman do not care for men, but have female attachments: the female companions [that is, lesbians] are of this sort. But they who are a section of the male follow the male, and while they are young, being slices of the original man, they have affection for men and embrace them [the Greek verb implies a sexual sense], and these are the best of boys and youths, because they have the most manly nature.

Plato said that the manliest men were the little gay boys … I’m kidding. Not really though; we’re talking young truckers dressed in flannel and slicked in oil … Blue? Nah. Why am I talking about Plato? I don’t even mention him in this chapter. Maybe the next though …

Stopped_clock |hellorf.com

Hopper has a dream – a very strange dream. What is your take on the dream? I  know my take on the dream, but that’s ‘cause it’s in my head.

Then it gets a little kissy. Declarations of love (to be inside each other – no rampant symbolism there) and some nipple tonguing is thrown in (for a friend) and then the bite that ruins EVERYTHING (not really though).

Hopper is such a twat. Why’s he gotta be so antagonistic? Butcher’s just doing what the good lord makes him do! *CHOMP CHOMP* (That’s all a lie.)

And then we got to his quiet stream. Readers of my Pusher/Hannibal fic, A Thousand Dreadful Things, might recognize Hop’s stream. It’s behind Will’s farmhouse in Purcellville where he likes to hide. It’s also where Tonny kicks Freddie’s ass and where Tonny gets to watch Will have a panic attack. Fun times. That was a pairing no one asked for, but you got it anyway. Huzzah!

So teeth and eyes … that was the inspiration for ch 27 in case you missed …

  • 15 uses of teeth
  • 11 uses of jaw
  • 9 uses of bite
  • 30+ uses of stares/looks/eye fucking/whathaveyou

I have this “beast with many teeth” meets “beast with many eyes” thing going, and they are doing the monster mash …

Out of curiosity, do you all lose respect for me after these long-winded posts in which I ramble and blather and divulge shit no one cares about? Because I do.

Hey, this is jewelweed:

Belleville New Democrat

And all that shit I said about it is true if you didn’t know.

It really does shine underwater.

flora.forager | Instagram

See? Pretty and relevant (later, though).

Oh yeah, I reference shit that happened in ch. 15: Ride out the Stormch 21: I am a Victimch 26: Like Grimm Death and probably more. Who’s keeping track?! *sweating intensifies*


In case you were unaware, these chapters are carefully stitched together and fawned over for weeks. I edit them daily (in many cases over 20 times by the time they are posted), painstakingly selecting every single word with intention and a purpose. It then goes to my anal retentive editor who I pay in sexual favors. He’s cool with it.

Not having the entire story finished is a monumental burden, because I have to keep track of over 120k words without missing one because some of you fuckers are analyzing this fic like it’s a goddamn Shakespearean play.

I love you, though, because you see beyond just the surface. You read down into the several layers of meaning, and you start to get a glimpse of just how much work has been poured into this fic. My heart goes out to all my readers for sticking with me and encouraging me thus far, despite the long update time. Much love, folks, many kisses.

And let’s not forget: it’s all FREEE!!! *whooping and hollering and crying*

In other words, support your favorite authors. And I’m not trying to make you comment on my work. I’m not your favorite. The writer with all that fluffy smut is your favorite. Go find them and comment on your favorite fic. Make that author’s day. If you get enjoyment from fic authors, pay it back a little. Writing isn’t easy.

If you enjoy my writing, please consider dropping me a comment here or, if applicable, on AO3 or by supporting my hot beverage habit on Ko-fi. Thank you!

—joanielspeak
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